Better To Burn Than To Fade Away
by AstoriaMalloy
Summary: Four years after the war, Hermione is happily engaged to Ronald Weasley and working for the justice department at the Ministry of Magic. After she's forced to offer Draco Malfoy a deal for his freedom, she is left remembering and struggling with their past, their present, and possibly their future.


Disclaimer: All rights to the characters, plot devices, etc. belong to JK Rowling, Scholastic, and Bloomsbury.

Just a quick note for those that aren't sure (because I plan on having many chapters), the italics will always be a dream, or a memory. Just to keep things consistent. Thanks for reading, and I always love constructive criticism.

Hermione walked quietly through the corridors, trying to reassure herself. This meeting had a purpose, an important one. After all, she had set it up. After several deep breathes she pushed open the door and strode in with all the confidence she could muster. She stared straight ahead as she took her seat, nodding towards Harry in acknowledgment.

She could already see the smirk forming on Draco's lips and it made her irrationally angry for the briefest of moments. She took a steading breathe, reminding herself that losing it wouldn't do any good. After arranging the papers on the table she looked up at him, meeting his steely gaze with one equally as cold.

"We're here today Mr. Malfoy because frankly, you're our only option. Believe me, I've tried everything else. It pains me to admit that you're our last chance, and it seems as if we're yours. I think we can help each other." She crossed her hands in front of her and waited, attempting a no nonsense persona that was less than convincing.

Harry coughed uncomfortably at the lack of response and slid the papers to his side of the table. After sorting through them he pulled one away from the rest and set it in front of Draco.

"These are people who have committed crimes far greater than yours, I can assure you. We already know you're aware of every person on this list, and their actions. While it pains me to let you go free without any more than an inconvenience, I've been directed to offer you a deal. In exchange for admissions and information regarding the Death Eaters, when the time comes, you will avoid imprisonment and persecution. I don't think I need to tell you that without this deal you are going to Azkaban."

He stared blankly, as If unaffected.

Hermione let out an annoyed sigh.

"Draco. Mr. Malfoy. Your family is included in this. The contract specifically included them, not just you. Your father would be released as soon as we receive the information. Your mother would avoid it all together. We both know that the crimes your father has committed will keep him where he is for the rest of his life, and your mother will follow suit, and while nothing would make me happier than to see you trapped in some cell in the sea, I know that's not what you want for them. So, consider it. You have 24 hours to accept the offer and after that it's out of my hands."

She could see no change in his features, but knowing him the way she did made her particularly inept at detecting the smallest shifts. He had blinked, and she knew he would take it. She nodded once, and left the contract on the table with a quill before leaving the way she had come. Harry followed her out, jogging to keep up with her pace.

"You reckon he'll take it?" he asked breathlessly, excitement evident in his voice. She forced a smile and ruffled his hair.

"Of course. He's a selfish prat. No doubt in my mind he'll sell his friends out to save his own hide."

Harry laughed and hugged her briefly as they separated. After working together for four years, it was no longer necessary for all of them to live in close quarters. Harry and Ginny shared a flat in London, while Hermione and Ron shared a studio apartment in Bethune. She had always wanted to live in France, far from the prying eyes of the Daily Prophet and media. Apparition made living close a trivial concern, and in case that wasn't an option, both households had a Floo compatible fireplace.

She turned onto a darkened alleyway, searching for a concealed place to apparate home. She looked around to make sure there were no pedestrians when she spotted him, making his way down the alley at a leisurely pace.

She couldn't feel her body anymore, she couldn't even think. She could feel her heart hammering against her chest, she could hear the rushing in her ears and the prickling heat of fear. He stopped in front of her and seemed annoyed by her reaction. He extended his hand, offering her the signed contract and shaking it lightly when she didn't take it. She reached out and grabbed it before tucking it back into her robes. She dared a peak at his face, and it had softened.

"I wouldn't have taken it from anyone else you know."

She nodded. That's why she had insisted on being there. He looked as if he wanted to say something, but instead turned and left her there, trying not to tremble. She took a moment to steady her nerves before heading home.

Ron was reclined on the sofa when she arrived, and he immediately calmed her nerves. He smiled at her and swung his legs over the side, before scooting over to make room for her. She immediately placed herself next to him and curled into his side, inhaling the strong aroma of grass and hair. She could never place exactly what it was, but his hair always relaxed her. She insisted he let it grow longer, and at the moment stray strands were tickling her face.

He kissed her for head and played with her hair.

"It was bad, wasn't it?" His voice had changed, and for the hundredth time she regretted telling him. When the war was over, and the dust had settled, she felt as if he had to know. She had never loved someone as completely as she had loved Ron. Keeping something so vital to her life from him felt wrong, and after his reassurance that he wouldn't tell another living soul, she explained Draco.

Her sixth year had been difficult for her, to say the least. She was wresting with unresolved feelings, inadequacies, all the things she assumed her peers were also struggling with. She had seen him in the library, searching for what seemed like answers. She had never witnessed that side of him, so determined and fragile, so unlike the boy she had hated.

Their first kiss had happened after Gryffindor's first Quidditch victory. After she had shed all of her tears and she had left Harry to enjoy the party, she found him nestled in a corner of the library, sleeping peacefully. The softness of his features, the sloppiness of his hair, the boy she saw sleeping and innocent had almost brought tears to her eyes. It was a defining moment, one in which she realized there was a gray area she had never considered.

She had moved towards him, stopping close and shaking him gently. He had woken slowly, and before she knew what was happening a pair of warm lips were pressing against her own. She felt a hand in her hair and desire like she had never felt before shot through her. She had returned the kiss with fervor, and it was the first of many moments like it.

Over the course of the year, she had fallen in love with him. She found herself defending him. They fought incessantly, she cried more than she had imagined possible. She was confused by his choices, scared for him, and terrified that her friends would find out.

It came to a cataclysmic halt the night Harry and Albus returned to the Astronomy Tower, and until the moment in the briefing room earlier today, she hadn't spoken to him.

Ron wouldn't speak to her immediately after she told him. She expected it, but it hurt all the same. He never told anyone though, and after his initial distrust and jealousy he had forgiven her. They rarely spoke of it since.

"It wasn't as bad as I thought it would be. He accepted the offer. It's more upsetting that he has to be free for them to be persecuted. It's not as if he's any better, but he's less of a threat."

He was quiet for a long time, tugging on her curls. She took this opportunity to lean up and kiss the corner of his mouth, with ignited a smile onto his freckled face. She smiled in return and kissed him fully on the mouth. She felt his arms around her, and she let herself fall into bliss.

_She could feel his hands pressed against her belly, his lips leaving feverish marks across her hip. She was making breathy pants, and he smirked. She could feel it, like he had branded her. _

"_Please, Draco. I can't wait anymore." _

_He looked up at her and actually smiled before crawling up her body. _

"_I've been waiting years for this, I think you can wait a few moments." _

_She shook her head defiantly, but couldn't help her own smile from creeping onto her face._

"_I love you, you know."_

"_Yeah, I know." She whined impatiently, tugging his head down to kiss her again. "I love you too." _


End file.
